techno geek day
today i’m wearing the following: Nextel cell phone, Motorola two-way pager, Kyocera cell phone, coded swipe-card badge, and jeans. ok the jeans aren’t high-tech but they’re cool, and it’s my blog so i can say what i want. i’m sitting in front of a dual video output PC running at a (now slow) 1100MHz, 785Mb RAM, 61.5Gb hard drive, dual CDR.

i bet carol 50 bucks on the Superbowl. and she won. thank God it was only 50 bucks

this is crazy: woman sues after recieving dead father’s frozen leg in mail, she thought it was a food dish, popular in the north

Authorities forced his divorced parents, Beatrice and Charles Norcross, to pay to incarcerate their daughter’s killer.

some IDIOT just decided that he/she saw the kidnapped lady from California… 4 weeks ago. what a moron.

Melissa M said if she had a lot of money, she’d help third-world children, because she’s a mercenary at heart. too funny.

hey kev, make sure you visit the bank before you deploy. no, not that bank.

dang i can’t believe i forgot to mention this… Joe Millionaire’s Sarah is apparently a foot fetish movie star. maybe that slurping was her tongue on evan’s feet…

wtf? - whatever it is, it has colin mockery in it… oh, and richard simmons. yeah.

freaky: Man drowns after phoning for help from submerged car

SUV story of the day

what i’m doing with this year’s tax refund

carol: my new favorite website

looks like i’m an unindicted federal felon

time to adopt

Sources at Fox are of two minds: Some say Marriott really is loaded, some say not. The ones who blab for the record, however, insist E.M. is dirt-poor. is FOX going to pull a

no words can describe a motorcycle hearse

we’re gonna kick some iraqi butt

remember me?
i’ve been off work but not really. actually i’ve been working from home. carol has been sick, so i’ve been doing the stay-at-home-dad kinda thing. yesterday i got her some flu medicine from Walgreens. they’ve got a great BO/GO sale going on. the medicine seemed to help out a lot so that was cool… i guess… which means it’s back to the grind for me. although the whole work-from-home thing is really nice.

i heard about this on TSS and thought it was funny… Microsoft fails to apply their own patch to their own machines

in some areas, you now get Tide with your marriage license along with Mr. Clean, and other items. how nice.

wild and yet hilarious story about a guy who gets attacked by a coyote while riding his lawnmower

groomer uses dog to wipe up urine - dog owner wasn’t too happy with the service provided… no kidding!

Catholics desperately need something to do

show and tell: this is my daddy’s pretty rock

dernit, we missed it

carol didn’t go to Florida. long story, i’m not going into it. good news is, she didn’t go.

now i definitely want one of these. i’m going to wear it around all family functions. and if they still ask, wear this one to their house.

drunk man mis-dials girlfriend, gets the police chief | also - pot smoking man confronts the wrong guy in road rage incident

speaking of police - two men were arrested for alledgedly hauling $660,000 worth of marijuana. problem: it was hay from a local nativity scene. charges have been dropped.

park service dorks get all steamed over funny commercial. sheesh | also: glacial melt reveals big, really big, really really big pile of moose doo-doo. thousands of years old. how exciting.

geez, i’m glad i never dated a geek. this girl is not so fortunate.

bummer: four marines die in copter crash

i wonder about parents like this. are they that desperate? obviously they are selfish. does anyone in this freakin’ world provide love for their children any more? ugh… things like this make me want to adopt 50 kids (carol would just love that, huh?)

squirrels beware: new BB guns on the market muhahhaha

LOTR - the third movie comes out in December. as a priviledged reader of my blog, i give you the ending to the third movie - hint: frodo fails

remember the game on The Price is Right where the little yodeling guy goes up the mountain? that was my favorite when i was around 9 years old. well, now thanks to the invention of the Internet (compliments of Al Gore), you can yodel along with the game. great fun. neat. good times.

carol would be good at this. see if you can link kevin bacon in there somewhere, too.

make your own candy heart

gadgetry
there are some machines in my house that i consider necessary evils. the main machine is my coffee maker. i love it. it wakes up every morning at 4:30 and makes coffee for me. it loves me. by time i get up, the coffee is piping hot. perfect. being that i’m the only one in the house that drinks coffee, i get the machine all to myself. how nice.
this weekend i bought a steamer and a food processor from a local thrift store. the food processor didn’t work so in the trash it goes. i didn’t try the steamer yet. i bought a catfish filet and will try that in there this week. i hope it works. i really wished the food processor woulda worked. it gets old chopping lettuce and potatoes when there’s a lazier way to do it…
i also bought carol a nice vaccuum cleaner. her brother actually ‘owed’ her one, but we may never get it that way.

A US Customs Primary Inspector at a border crossing asked the driver of this Suburban for vehicle registration. Suddenly, a hand came out of the glove compartment, producing the requested document which the driver showed the Inspector. Since the driver did not appear to be a member of the “Adams Family”, the Inspector became suspicious, thus leading to a full search.

Just think, if alien smugglers can put a 135-lb body behind the dashboard, imagine what they could do with dope.

pic | pic | pic

thanks, kev

Rapist stops attack when victim begins to pray
After the woman began pleading to God, the attacker stood up and asked if she was a Christian. When she said yes, he zipped up his pants, apologized and shook her hand, according to police.

update: bird $h!t bakery to reopen - i’ll bet the customers flock like seagulls…

taking political correctness a bit too far - the cemetary

newsflash: drugs are a problem in prisons

new car modifications bother Oakland residents

our old place sucked. it was an old, not-taken-care-of house. there was no (or little) insulation. when we moved to the new place, we were hoping that the higher rent would be offset by lower utility costs. we were right. at the old place we were paying around $230 a month for electricity. our first bill at the new place, $75. YES! - the same wasn’t true for these people

the unseen Gulf War - warning: graphic!

today is National Pie Day. and to celebrate, a sketch

new stor card holds up to 5Gb of data, it’s the size of a credit card. what’s in your wallet?

geeks are the reason for the recent attacks on SUV’s. wait a minute - i’m a SUV-drivin’ geek - where do i fit in?

can’t find that perfect prom dress? try duct-tape

canadian world domination

build your houseplan, then walk through your house. pretty cool but i got bored quick.

stinky people
now, i’m not Mr. Hygeine, but c’mon, show a little love for me here. stinky people are the worst.

when i was younger, around 1988 or so my dad and i took a Lotus 123 class through Jefferson College. it was a night class, and i was an up-and-coming geek. my dad was trying to be, but would never reach geek status. (tangent: he used to password his computer and in those days there was no encryption. i’d go into the log files and other executables and could usually find the password, unencoded. that made him mad) anyway, my dad was a smoker. it was the first time i ever remember being embarrassed of my father. he smelled like a smoker. i never noticed it, i guess because the truck smelled like it, the house smelled like it, everything did, so i never paid attention to it. but at the anti-septic janitor-cleaned school i could smell him. ugh. as a teenager it was a bit embarrassing. i’m not really sure why, though, because everyone else in the class was in their 40’s. it wasn’t like i was afraid the hottie next to me would laugh or something… (tangent: boy, now i wish my dad was here, smelly or not)

anyway, now i have other smelly people in my life. for some reason, i can’t stand the smell of smoke. my cube-mate smokes. fortunately, he is Mr. Hygeine, and usually blows the smoke away from him, etc. so he never smells real bad. if he buys this, i’m quitting. there are many others, and i’m not going to bore you with the details. everyone knows the deal anyway. non smokers can’t stand the smell. and smokers either don’t care that they stink, or don’t realize it. i’d put my money on the first.

so, what do you do when someone comes to your non-smoking house? sure, they may smoke outside, but nonetheless they still bring that stinky jacket and clothes in (we can’t ask them to wash everything and take a shower before entering). ugh.

why am i on this rant? heck i dunno. it’s something to do. and i’m not perfect. at times, i stink, too. muhahahha

crabby butt
last night i was really grumpy. well, i wasn’t, until i finished The Partner by John Grisham. the ending made me really crabby for some reason. it was a really good read, well, until the end.
but that wasn’t the only reason. carol’s brother was over, and he was downloading songs from Kazaa and burning CDs. he does this two or three times a week. i don’t know who could possibly know that many songs. i assume he’s selling them. whatever. anyway, last night i wanted to go to bed and he was still there… the puter is in our room. so i waited. crabby. waited. sleepy. crabby. carol and her brother are leaving for Florida on friday, and returning on Sunday. putting a ton of miles on the truck, not to mention wear and tear. that’s a lot of driving for my baby. i was crabby about that, too. i’d hate for her to leave and wreck or something and then i’ll regret it forever. i’m turning into my mom. worrying too much. (and crabby hahaha). but i’ll get over it. stuck at home all weekend with 4 rambunxious (sp?) kids, oh joy. it’s ok, because come april, i’ll be doing the same thing to carol.

is that a caboose parked in your back yard? compliments of arches.org, a friends website

why you don’t like Chuck E. Cheese’s
for years we took our kids to CEC every birthday. after a while, it got old. apparently this is the same experience that a lot of other parents have. so, we stopped going. so did others. why don’t you like it? i’ve heard a few arguments, listed below.

point #1 - CEC is a children’s playground. they serve beer. why?

point #2 - CEC is nothing but a breeding ground for future gamblers. children get coins, play games, lights flash, noises are loud, sometimes they win coins back

point #3 - it’s too freakin’ expensive! the average birthday party (as of 3 years ago) was around $75 i believe. you could, of course, bring your own cake, plates, etc and rent a room, but from other parents i heard that that idea ended up costing them MORE than the pre-designed parties

point #4 - shutup

the big black triangle in the sky - myth or truth?

straight from a science-fiction story - doctors reattach mans head after it was nearly severed in car wreck

that song in my head
i’ve been singing Build Me Up Buttercup all morning, and it’s starting to annoy me. i have no idea why, i didn’t hear it on the radio last night (country station) and i didn’t hear it this morning (talk show) so i’m not sure where it came from. nonetheless, it’s annoying as heck

got a headache? no? try this, you should have one within 20 seconds…

now i know what happens when i’m away from my computer | or how about some wood contour?

umm… ode to david hasselhoff???

for all your dumba$$ needs, announcing the dumba$$ database

wtf?

when the Rams won the Superbowl, we celebrated. when the Raiders win, they also celebrate

NAACP upset at Gun Barn sign - no kiddin?

yet another laboratory mix-up

sad: mother takes meth, breastfeeds baby to kill it - idiot!

another criminal has a bad day - as my brother once told me: if they were smart, they wouldn’t be criminals - so true, kev, so true…

mother kills her kids, then blames it on her 5 year old… what a cheap cop-out

learn all about skeletons

Coke to change the style of their boxes to be more regrigerator-safe. gee, thanks.

edgar allan poe continues to mystify

the seven unsolved math questions don’t yet have a solution, but if you do, there’s a cool $1M in it

missouri is one of the most dangerous states - for police officers

chris pirillo’s hail to coffee - AMEN | after reading chris’s blog, i wonder how he got the job, and even more, how he keeps it. makes me wonder if i shouldn’t start a local version of his show, or maybe a radio version, or something. if he can do it, with obvious dislike, why not me? hmm..

geek news - mitnik to log onto internet, first time in 8 years - well, first time legally